Well, unlike my sister (who was not pressured into starting a blog), i was nudged a little bit toward the idea. However, i feel that it will be a great way to relieve the stresses of the day. So, here goes!
Thinking back over last week, i was fully able to grasp the importance of being able to call on God for his strength, step up to the plate, and take care of things that needed to be done. I'm not talking about things like cleaning the house, or making my bed when i wake up. I mean more along the lines of being able to do things that will ulitimately show Christ's glory and love to those who desperately need to see. Those are the things that are tough to do, and the only way to carry them out is with God's hands there to push you onward. Showing His glory has never really been the top priority in my life, sad to say. I've always let things get in the way... Sports, entertainment, etc. and even used lack of time as an excuse (which is probably the dumbest excuse i could ever have made).
But God rocked my world this past week, and i had a VERY interesting thing happen to me that i didnt tell anyone about, because it sounds like something that someone would make up just to make everyone else feel better about their situation. Wednesday night, I was sitting upstairs in my sister's house in the game room where i was going to sleep, and i just fell down face first on the floor, and cried out to God to just reveal Himself to me in some way, to show me His glory and to ease my anxiety about the next day (which was when we were supposed to receive the verdict in the trial). And i just lay there with my face buried in the carpet, begging and begging and begging for God to show Himself to me. I got up off the ground, and laid on the futon on my back, with my eyes open, just waiting, listening, and expecting. And very suddenly, i realized that it had become pitch black in the room, no lights from the sattelite receiver, none from Tim's laptop that was charging on the table in front of me, no light from the moon through the windows, which was really odd to me. But in a quick instant it seemed, i just felt calm. and i sat up on the futon, and i could not see. thats why there were no lights. And i didn't hear a little voice, no booming voice, but i FELT "I Am here". I really dont know how to explain it. I just can't, but in my best attempt, it seemed to me like it was spoken, my mind received it as being communicated to me, but i KNOW that i heard nothing. But as i sat there, i felt without a doubt, that God was sitting right beside me. I cannot explain the calm that just settled over me!! It was like He reached in my brain and pushed everything that i was anxious about to the very back part of my mind! Oddly enough, it still took me a while to fall asleep, but it certainly wasn't because i was nervous or anxious!! i was SO excited about what had just happened that i couldn't!!!! I've read many accounts of instances like this but i never imagined i would experience one for myself! Shows what i know... Thats really the best way i can describe what happened to me, but unless you experience it for yourself, words will NEVER do it justice. But God knew my needs, and He heard my cry, and oh was he faithful!
